How far have you come? How high have you climbed? What more is there for you to do?
We ask ourselves these questions everyday, in some way, as we go about our business – doing our dishes, going to work, watching television, playing football etc.
Our brains are always churning. Asking those questions. But what we are really trying to answer is:
- Am I good enough?
- Have I done enough?
- Am I DOING enough?
It’s tiring really.
Yet, we never get truly tired of doing it.
In fact, you might say we LOVE doing it. Contrasting. Evaluating. Analyzing, Examining. Assessing.
We love to do what we hate. – Romans 7, anyone?
We Love It Because Comparison Gives Us A Quick Answer.
It gives us an imaginary ruler with which to measure ourselves.
My life is going well because I am doing better than him.
My life is going badly because she is further ahead than me.
I am attractive because I get more attention than they do.
I am unsuccessful because someone my age already has the job, marriage, body, house, platform or lifestyle that I want. Social media has become a major platform / tool to aid our “comparison addiction”.
However, Social Media Did Not Invent Comparison, But It Has Industrialized It.
It gives us an endless supply of people to measure ourselves against. Not just our neighbours, classmates or coworkers, but millions of people from around the world.
And we are rarely comparing our complete lives to their complete lives.
We compare our ordinary Tuesday afternoon to their wedding photos. Our unfinished work to their announcement. Our private insecurities to their edited confidence. Our behind-the-scenes to their final production.
Then, after consuming hundreds of carefully selected moments, we look at our own lives and wonder why they seem so plain.
But perhaps your life is not behind.
Perhaps you are simply using the wrong ruler.
Social Media Rewards What Can Be Seen.
And that is part of the problem.
Social media naturally highlights what is visible: the new job, the engagement, the holiday, the transformation, the achievement, the perfectly lit Sunday outfit.
But some of the most important things God is doing in you cannot be posted.
Patience is difficult to photograph.
Integrity does not always come with an announcement.
Forgiving someone who hurt you may never receive applause.
Remaining faithful when life is boring, painful or confusing will probably not go viral.
Yet these things matter deeply to God.
We can become so focused on producing a life that looks impressive that we neglect the quiet work of becoming more like Christ.
The internet may reward visibility. God rewards faithfulness.
You Are Comparing Results Without Seeing The Process.
You see the opportunity, but not the years of rejection.
You see the marriage, but not the loneliness that came before it.
You see the confidence, but not the insecurity they had to fight through.
You see the finished product, but not the fear, failure, prayer, sacrifice and support behind it.
We make conclusions about our lives using information we do not actually have.
That person you envy may be carrying something you would never willingly trade for.
Their life may genuinely be beautiful. But it is still incomplete, complicated and human – just like yours.
We Can Never Completely Stop Comparing Ourselves In This Life. In Fact, We Shouldn’t.
Comparison is actually a good thing. But like every good thing, we can abuse it.
Comparison can reveal growth. It can show us what is possible. It can expose areas where we need discipline, wisdom or correction.
The problem is not merely that we compare.
The problem is WHO we use as our standard, and what we believe the comparison says about our worth.
Someone else’s success can inspire you, but it cannot define you.
Someone else’s beauty can be appreciated without becoming an accusation against your own.
Someone else being ahead does not mean you have failed. You are not even running the same race!
Why Jesus, Really? (Removing The Christianese)
“…And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.” – Hebrews 12:1-2
Why? Because whatever you constantly look at becomes the standard you judge yourself with.
If you focus on Jesus, you will not miss your finish line. If you focus on others, you might end up leaving the track completely.
Jesus gives us a better measurement for life.
- Not: “Am I more impressive than the next person?”
- But: “Am I becoming more loving?”
- Not: “Do people admire me?”
- But: “Am I faithful when nobody is watching?”
- Not: “Have I achieved enough to prove my worth?”
- But: “Am I living from the worth God has already given me?”
Jesus does not free us from comparison by telling us that standards do not matter. He gives us the RIGHT standard.
And Even Then, Looking At Jesus Is Not Meant To Crush Us.
We do not look at His perfection and pretend we can earn our way towards Him. We look at the One who already came towards us.
The Christian life is not a desperate attempt to become valuable.
It is the gradual process of learning to live like someone who is already loved.
So, perhaps the question is not whether you are measuring your life.
You already are.
The question is: What imaginary ruler are you using – and who handed it to you?
